ALAN'S RUN ON SDL DRAFT REACTION

by Jason on May. 05, 2023

BY AO

AO's Draft Reactions that nobody asked for but I'm drinking wine in Italia and love run-on sentences.

ROUND 1

1. Costa - Ball Excellent choice, especially for defensive stud and the SDL ASG MVP! Like this Cabernet sauvignon Ball has aged gracefully into a complete guard. It's only because of his stupid false humility that there was even a chance he would go 2nd, nevermind in the second round. Glad to see him go first after all the work he does for the SDL.
2. DP - Quin Second best pick goes... Second. Easy enough and another good pairing, like this fancy cheese I can't pronounce. Stoked to have DP back; thought he'd never return after getting sucker punched by Mr. 63 in the SDL playoffs. I would never endanger my good looks like that, and he's even more handsome than I.
3. Daniels - Ghost Lol, I forgot Ghost is not his actual Christian name. Old reliable continues the chalk trend, and honestly it should. Ghost is the first 'big' body to complement the first guard captain. Plus they have chemistry from last season.
4. Jorge - AO What a stupid idiot pick. I'm available for trade.
5. Nair - DTO DTO is like the pick above, but better. Cooks me every time we play and smiles while he does. Fits nicely with Nair. More on this in the power rankings, but Nair's big question will revolve around his return and less about the actual draft results.

ROUND 2

1. Nair - DTO - Lynch Interesting. I had Lynch at 3 on my big board. An actual D3 player should always go #1 in this watered down rec league. But questions abound after he got injured. Hopefully he returns to form quickly, as they'll need help immediately.
2. Jorge - AO - Roberts Tim is a walking bucket. He was a big reason his team played in the finals two seasons past. Not sure if the captains remembered him but honestly this was the spot he would have gone regardless. Only issue is this team is tiny.
3. Daniels - Ghost - Ellabidy Adam is good. You put a lefty in a league of chumps and no one knows how to play defense. Which is a problem when we don't want to play defense to begin with. But are you telling me half and Adam is better than a full glass of E, Charles, or rookie X..? Actually ya.
4. DP - Quin - Jack DP continues to take people I don't know so I'm forced to make shit up. Lucky I do that for a living. Jack gives this team more size. If he can walk and chew gum look out. Even if not I really like the idea of 2 wings/guard setup. This should be an athletic team.
5. DC - Ball - E Augh. This was the only place I thought would fit and surprise! There he goes. E brings crazy intense defense and a wilder shot selection. But the man makes winning plays and on team that can hide his offensive warts he should shine. The slide ends here

ROUND 3

1. DC - Ball - E - Charles Sir Charles completes an impressive starting group. He started turning heads halfway through the season as a stretch 4 and never looked back. Ball & I talked him up during the ASG so I'm not shocked they pair up here. With the best player setting these guys up this will be the best defensive unit. No weaknesses. Yet.
2. DP - Quin - Jack - Rak Ahhh... Idk. I thought I knew what DP was cooking. You take a bunch of handsome athletic runners and let loose the hounds of war. Rakusin is like putting a pitbull in the mix. Will the MIP fit in? Will he change his game again?? Will people understand this unbelievably beautiful metaphor??? Only time will tell.
3. Daniels - Ghost - Adam - Pat Cam!!!! Pat was supposed to reunite with his pickup crew. Instead he gets rewarded for another growth season with a starting role. Pat gives this team the spacing on O. I'm curious who he guards on a weekly basis. Less about him then the 5th pick when Adam is out. PS - he should have been MIP again but the committee (JAMIL) outvoted me.
4. Jorge - Alan - Roberts - Lunder Here comes the thunder! I have no freaking clue about this guy but it felt like a good time for a rookie pick. Theoretically a 2/2 wing/guard setup should work this season. God I hope so. Somebody save me.
5. Nair - DTO - Lynch - Ruff What was the name of the QB everyone thought was going to Houston only to sit in the green room all day? Levis?? Ruff did not deserve this fate, and hopefully he remembers I wrote nice things about him before we play. I see many 3s and shoulder shimmies already. We've always been friends. Honestly though, Nair lucked out with a guy that can captain a team while he recovers. Get well soon bud.

ROUND 4

I'm running out of steam, sobriety and wine.

Nair - DTO - Lynch - Ruff - Breda "Talks a lot" small guard. Yikes. Who wants another AO? I take back the nice things I said. Unless this is a sand bag? Feels like a sand bag.

Jorge - AO - Roberts - Lunder - Agresti Sweet pick. Someone to do all the dirty things so I can relax on the sidelines and play 2mins a quarter. Chris will be sneaky good in a small watered down league. And he screens better than my captain. PS - our team name is Under Agresti.

Daniels - Ghost - Adam - Pat - Dre You forgot about Dre. He only made it to the chip. Another awesome role player. Let him guard the best player on the other team. That's what I did.

DP - Quin - Jack - Rak - Slick There are 3 timelines here: 1) Slick is inebriated and doesn't know he got picked 2) Slick is big mad he got picked this late and will actually do the drills I sent him 3) Slick is too preoccupied with the NYK to care Fwiw I love this pick. Shooting and gives a shit attitude from your 5th man is a luxury. Made real strides last season, got some reps in the CAC CUP finals.

DC - Ball - E - Charles - Cam The other Cam Daniel. Honestly thought he would go higher this round. Tougher than he looks. Works for everything. And doesn't let you take a play off on defense with his cutting. I regret we didn't take him because now I have to guard him. Damn it.

ROUND 5

DC - Ball - E - Charles - Cam - Waldman Forget what I said about the last round. I'm wine happy and the captains are idiots. Should have taken a swing on the not short rookie a round ago. DC completes his team with no weaknesses. The only way he loses is if I steal his gun before every game.

DP - Quin - Jack - Rak - Slick - Stull Stull nailed SEVEN 3s one time last season. Against my team of course. Many on me. And then he immediately turned back into a pumpkin. I don't think any other last round picks have that upside.

Daniels - Ghost - Adam - Pat - Dre - Marra Ehh, maybe Marra could hit 7 treys. But he won't take that many shots bc he's a good team player. Makes me sick. Be selfish !

Jorge - AO - Roberts - Lunder - Agresti - Neil I don't know anyone braver than Neil. He survived a season with the Tayos and CAME BACK. Makes him either a sadist or braver than the troops. Who can tell?

Nair - DTO - Lynch - Ruff - Breda - Ben Mr. Irrelevant! Welcome back!! Come hoop with me at Powder House again.

That's it for the draft and my liver boys. Hope you enjoyed it because I don't get paid for this analysis.

Good luck tomorrow, unless we play, in which case get bent.